Barbecue Chips: A Lesson in Abundance
By Summer Bacon
I was standing in the kitchen this morning looking for something to eat. Usually I eat leftovers from dinner, but the Italian Shepherd Pie that I'd made the night before was particularly popular with my family, and there wasn't a bite left.
I spied the bag of Lay's Barbecue chips sitting on the counter, opened the bag and pulled out a chip. I placed it on my tongue, and melted with delight at the flavor. There's nothing quite like barbecue chips for flavor satisfaction. I love barbecue chips.
Sometimes the simplest of moments can turn profound in an instant. As I savored each chip, dipping some into a yummy cucumber-dill yogurt dip, I had the thought that nothing else in the world really mattered; that my life was full and abundant at that moment because I had barbecue chips. I felt this depth of gratitude for the fact that I was fortunate enough to be standing in my messy kitchen, surrounded by boxes full of Christmas decorations, the rain drizzling outside, and there I was eating barbecue chips and drinking a cup of coffee with cream and honey for breakfast. What more could a forty-seven year old woman ask for in life?
My thoughts turned to my grocery shopping trip the day before.
I have carefully clipped and collected coupons for the past several months as part of my "avoid bankruptcy, and pay off the bills" tactic. I used to do this many years ago, and actually enjoyed the challenge of saving money with coupons. One day I shopped so wisely that I didn't have to write a check or pay cash for my groceries, I actually got money back from the store after they deducted my coupons from my purchases!
So, yesterday I went to the store on a day that I normally do not shop, because I wanted to make sure I could take full advantage of the amazing holiday sales that they were having. I bought one chuck roast at a discount and got a second one for free. I bought twenty cans of veggies for only ten dollars. (I'll be donating some of those to the Sedona Community Center.) Baby back ribs, just $3.49 per pound. Lay's potato chips: two for $5. Overall, I saved $72 on that shopping trip, and filled the fridge and pantry.
It has been a most interesting year for me. My Dad hates it when I share about my personal financial situation, but I feel it's important to let you know how things go for me. This year has been financially challenging, to the point where I have worried I might lose my home, and have to file bankruptcy. Some people believe that just because I seem to have a direct line to Spirit, that my life must be without bumps in the road; a hassle-free existence. On the contrary! Sometimes it seems that the challenges are accelerated in my life ever since I made this commitment to working with Spirit on a daily basis.
Since I opened the Institute I have sunk an enormous amount of money into this project with Spirit, and have gotten myself into deep debt. The financial stuff finally took a toll on me this year, and I have spent many hours crying and groaning and cursing God and Spirit for "doing this to me." (Yeah, right. Like, they wrote the checks, and like they swiped the debit and credit cards.)
I know, however, that God provides. But, I truly have wanted not just to know this and believe this, but to experience it.
Well, it turns out that I have been experiencing it all along. I just didn't see it. The lessons for me this year have been more than just financial. And, God has provided me with exactly the lessons I've needed to learn in order to live a more abundant and fulfilling life.
First, on the financial end of things, thanks to my dear Dad, I am working to pay off my debt one bill at a time, and have made huge progress in just a few short months. (The key is: pay off your highest interest credit card FIRST, and pay the minimum, or a bit over, on any other cards. A tip from my friend Lorina yielded this: call your credit card companies and ask for them to lower your interest rates. I did, and all of mine lowered the interest substantially: like, from 27 percent to 10 percent and lower. Cool.)
As a result of my financial repair plan, I have been more conservative in spending (the bulk of which goes to groceries, because I LOVE to cook). I clip coupons regularly, and really enjoy the Zen-like experience and chess-game-like challenge that it provides me.
But, most importantly (and, right now I WISH I could bring you into my heart so that you could understand this in a profound and revelatory way), I have made my peace with fears of financial devastation.
How?
Well, one day last week I was cleaning the bedroom, and I was thanking God and Spirit for my life, and for the incredible shifts that are happening with my finances (slow, but steady), and I said, "But, you know, it would be nice to have more financial security."
"So, what is the worst thing that could happen to you, Summer, if you should lose everything?" I heard a loud and clear Voice ask me.
"Well, I could die, I guess," I responded.
I heard laughter.
"Okay. What is the worst thing that could happen to you, Summer, if you should lose everything, and you LIVED?" Spirit's voice reworded the question.
I stopped tucking in the sheets on the bed, paused and looked towards the heavens and thought about this. I mean I really visualized what that would be like. I stripped away my home, my car, my possessions of every kind. I saw myself wiped out, at ground zero, with only me, Karl, my children, Cosmo Brown the dog, Kittenian the cat, my parents, friends, clients and others around me. I sat with this visualization for a few moments (maybe a whole minute passed), and I realized--no, "realized" is a shallow and empty word for what I experienced--I ABSORBED the moment into me....
...and lo and behold, I discovered that, without all the stuff that I thought mattered, I WAS STILL ME. Nothing about me, Summer Bacon, changed at all. I was still me. I was still someone that I really like. And, guess what? I looked at my family, friends, animals, others...I mean, this extended to the whole wide world...and I saw all of the opportunities and possibilities that still existed for me, despite what I thought would be the "end of my existence." Nothing would end, it would only change! Like death, "the end" is an illusion. It's more like, "The End. Or...is it?" as those old movies used to express.
Most of all, I still had God, Jesus Christ, a whole band of angels, Dr. Peebles, and my channeling abilities. I still had my ability to write, to think, to live, laugh, love and learn! I still had all of the things in my life that really matter! I HAD MY FAMILY! I HAD MY FRIENDS! I HAD GOD! I HAD SPIRIT! Wow...
In other words, I had lost absolutely NOTHING! The veil of illusion was stripped away from me, and I was left standing in absolute truth. When all else disappeared, there was only LOVE.
Oh God, I wish I could take you there with me. It was a moment of revelation that has granted peace to my heart like nothing else I have ever experienced.
Will I successfully whiddle down my debt over the next ten years? I believe so. But, I'm not worrying so much about the endless tomorrows. I am thinking more about what is here today.
Like, for example, barbecue chips. Man, those taste SO good. The breakfast of champions. Not as good as my Italian Shepherd Pie or the Korean Won Tons we will have for dinner, but extraordinary nevertheless. Savory, flavorful barbecue chips. Yum, yum.
Live life to the fullest. That doesn't mean, necessarily, having to poke your nose into every nook and cranny on the earth. Live life to the fullest NOW, HERE, TODAY! All that you are and ever have been adds up to this moment. There truly, really is nothing else, and in that understanding there is EVERYTHING.
God bless you all, and may you have the most joyful holidays ever. I know that I will, and I will hold you in my heart.